Wayne Enterprises Buys SchoolShift.com
Story by William Guerin
In a move that shocked many in the financial sector, Wayne Enterprises (formerly WayneCorp) purchased online school resource SchoolShift.com for $25 million. The acquisition astonished most people because of the company’s lack of experience in dot-com businesses. Wayne Enterprises is owned by Bruce Wayne but the day-to-day operations are largely run by Lucius Fox.
The bidding war began when LexCorp, one of Wayne Enterprises (NYSE:BAT) biggest competitors, put in a bid for the online-business. The terms of the original deal by LexCorp were not disclosed. After the bid by LexCorp, Bruce Wayne said that he had always dreamed of owning a dot-com business, after seeing the success of his favourite website, petsweaters.com.
Analysts aren’t sure if Bruce Wayne will be running the daily operations for the dot-com business, as analysts aren’t really sure what Bruce Wayne does during the day. One thing is for sure, however, that he has a very busy nightlife, so he couldn’t possibly have a secret identity.
The already largely rich Bruce Wayne has recently come into additional money around the date of July 18. When asked by original author of this story, William Guerin, what the connection to that date was, Wayne jokingly replied “If I told you that, I’d have to kill you.”
In an unrelated story, we would like to send our condolences to the Guerin family on the loss of husband and loving father, William Guerin.
Please note: This story is obviously fake. If you believed this, shame on you. All the names and corporations in the story are property of their respective owners. But while you’re here, why don’t you look around the site. The stock chart is property of Yahoo! Finance.